"I'm 100x More Humble Than You'll Ever Be!!" \(^o^)/

I've posted many times about movies and music and such but these past few posts have been more personal stuff. With these I hope you guys get a better idea of the type of person I am.

I'm kind of arrogant. I'll put that out there as a statement of fact. And if you ever meet me you'd figure it out pretty quickly anyway. Not quite cocksure I'd say, but arrogant.

And I like it. <(￣◡￣)>

I wouldn't say I'm overly prideful either. I don't think I'm better than you and you. Is this confusing? I'm trying to think of how to put it into words...

Basically, it's like, I'm one of my own favorite people.
Yeah, I suppose that's the best way to describe it. The feeling has an inward focus. I think to myself, "Man, who wouldn't want to be my friend?" but not a "Hah, why would you want to be his friend? You should want to be mine instead. *sneer*". Not like that. Mine is not the arrogance of someone who belittles everyone around him. I prefer to surround myself with friends and that's really not a good way to make nor to keep them.

A friend once told me this is how she thinks I see myself. It's utterly true.

I'm an awesome person and I have awesome friends. Like calls to like, does it not?
d-(^_______^)-b
And I don't hesitate to tell them this. (Both that I'm awesome and that they are too.) The feeling is rather circular, I'll admit. I'm awesome so, of course, I'd make friends with awesome people. These awesome people want to be my friends so, of course, I must be awesome, too."

I guess you could say I possess an over-abundance of self-esteem.
From whence does this fountain of positive energy spring? After all, I haven't done anything awe-inspiring in nor with my life yet. I've never saved a mother and child from a burning fire. I've never held a dying man in my arms and comforted him as he breathed his last. I'm neither the fastest nor the strongest. I have friends who are better looking, haha! Where then? Why?

Ironically, perhaps even perversely, it's because I've been told many things to the contrary many times in my life. I've had a lot of people tell me I'm not this, not that, not good enough, not cool enough. And I took it, considered it, and now I believe them wrong. My entire life, I'll encounter a lot of people who are going to try and bring me down with scorn and derision.
People who can't do it will laugh and jeer when I fail.
People who can do it better will taunt and mock when I attempt.
There will always be people who will try to knock me down, to erode away my sense of self-worth.

I prefer to lean into the wind.

A Motivating Dream

That is to say 'twas not motivational for 'twas I that did the motivating.

I was back at Uni hanging out with some friends. Interestingly, I actually know the memory from which this dream got its setting.

The memory:
A batch of us went to the combination Baskin-Robbins/Dunkin Donuts just off-grounds. We'd just seen Thor [2011] (it was a'ight) and, as usual, we still wanted to hang out so ice cream became the order of the night. When we got there we all went in, save one. I shall call him P-boy.

Oh, I should mention that the group of us are all in the same club together, which explains why he was there even though I wouldn't call him a friend of mine.

Anyhoo, P-Boy. He's kind of a sad sack. His attitude is often melancholy (you should see his FB statuses, which he insists on updating frequently. I swear it's almost a plea for attention). He lacks self-esteem and he's an introvert but he tries to put himself out there as a confident out-going man.

To put it succinctly, he's the opposite of me in almost every way. Haha. No make that every way. If you only knew... But if you did I would have to wonder how.... (Ô.o)

Oh, going off on a tangent there. Another post will come later with the rest of that. LOOK FORWARD TO IT SUCKAS!! (Ò_____Ó)-b

Anyway, when everyone went into the BR/DD P-boy turned and left without a word. In reality I said, "Meh." In the dream, though, I went after him and we talked.

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Why are you so sad all the time?
Why should I be happy?
Life. Life is awesome.
Of course you're always chipper, you can fly.
*Note: Regular readers will know by now that I can fly in my dreams.
So? I'd still be happy even if I couldn't fly. (It's true. I am even though I can't. (O_<)-b)
Oh really? I wouldn't be sad ever if I could fly.
I doubt that. You'd still be your sad self even if you could do this. *hover hover* What would you do if you could fly? 
I'd just take off whenever I wanted.
Yeah, you could go anywhere, but you'd go alone. You'd watch the sunsets, admire the landscapes? Then what? Take pictures of yourself? Probably make you even more depressed when you start to feel isolated and alone.
I'd be special though, different. I could do something most people can't.
That last one isn't the key to happiness. Why is it important whether other people can do a thing or not? Is there some kind of inflation of value going on here? You can run and jump, taste and smell. Not everyone can do all of these things, you know?
Yeah, but most people can.
So you're actively taking them for granted? As in, you're making a conscious effort to do so? In that case, I really can't help you. That applies to all those places you would have gone with a flight ability too. All those exotic places you might have gone, thousands have been there before. O how will you enjoy them now, hmm? This isn't some Pokémon world dammit. You don't have to be the very best. You just have to be all you can be. And every one is special. They just have to realize that.

At this point the dream changed and I was talking to a friend along similar lines. But that's a separate story.